"The larva of the cicada on attaining full size in the ground becomes a nymph; then it tastes best, before the husk is broken. At first the males are better to eat..."

"... but after copulation the females, which are then full of white eggs." Wrote Aristotle, quoted in "How to Cook Cicadas, According to 3 Richmond, Va., Chefs/Cicadas are swarming the East Coast, and three Southern chefs are cooking them up every which way. Kung pao bugs, anyone" (Bon Appétit). 3 recipes at the link, plus this revelatory tip:

After all, if cicadas [are] the shrimp of the dirt, they should stand in just fine for their pink cousins...

... in whatever shrimp recipes you've got.

Since the word "shrimp" has popped up, let me drop in this song I chanced into yesterday when I was researching the question what are the greatest melodies? 

 

How many shrimps do you have to eat/Before you make your skin turn pink?

"Some fun fact about these little creatures: In Vietnam we eat them"/"How dare you come here and say that. Oh nonooooooo."

"those were delicacies in someplace in VN,some are just plain street food,some are expensive high class dishes, I’m sadly have to announce to you that." 

 From "A Little Vietnamese Mossy Frog" (Reddit).

ADD: There's a truly adorable photo at the link, which is the reason I'm blogging this. Please don't think I'm blogging this to attack the animal-eating choices of people in a foreign country. Unless we're vegetarians, we eat the animals we're used to eating, and we don't give a reprieve for cuteness. We eat lambs if we like lamb. Here's video of a lamb dreaming, presumably not of becoming a chop.

"Under the new junk food controls, people will be rewarded with shopping vouchers for losing weight and exercising more under a 'fit miles' incentive scheme to encourage healthier living...."

"[T]he Queen’s Speech promised a 'total ban online' for junk food. Food companies will be limited to factual claims about such products, such as price, ingredients and nutritional content, and will be unable to publish sponsored social media influencing about cakes, sweets, burgers and other unhealthy foods. Paid-for displays, web searches and promotional emails and text messages will also be banned. Advertisers believe that all social media posts about unhealthy products could be banned, although details have yet to be set out.... Critics say advertisements for avocados, smoked salmon, hummus, butter, cheese and some fruit could be banned if the rules are drawn too tightly."

From "Queen’s Speech includes ban on online junk food ads to curb obesity" (The London Times). 

Here's the text of the speech. She actually refers to "obesity": "Measures will be brought forward to support the health and wellbeing of the nation, including to tackle obesity and improve mental health." 

Do American politicians ever tell us we're too fat? I think not, even though obesity has been a huge factor in coronavirus deaths. They're so much more comfortable telling us how close we should be to our loved ones than broaching the big bigness topic.

"In 2016, during a trip to Zagreb, Croatia, he wandered into the Museum of Broken Relationships."

"As he studied the remnants of strangers’ failed romances—photos of hookup spots; a diet book that a woman received from her fiancé—West came up with an idea for a museum dedicated to failed business products and services. A year later, in Helsingborg, Sweden, he opened the Museum of Failure.... One example on display at the museum was the Newton, a personal digital assistant released by Apple in 1993... also... Bic for Her, a line of pens... DivX, a 2003 trademark for 'self-destructing' DVDs that could be watched for only forty-eight hours.... West realized that if the experience of failure had expedited human innovation, then the experience of disgust was potentially holding us back. Could that aversion be challenged or changed? 'I just wanted to know, Why is it that even talking about eating certain things makes my skin crawl?'... The planning for the [Disgusting Food Museum] began with a more basic question: What counts as food?...Disgust may have originated as a food-rejection system, Paul Rozin, a psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania, told me, 'but it has expanded into a vehicle for perceiving the social and moral world.' Rozin is the pioneer of a subfield called disgust studies. His favorite experiment involves dropping a cockroach into a glass of juice. Most people, of course, refuse to drink the juice, citing the dirtiness of cockroaches. 'What’s amazing is that even if you disinfect the cockroach and convincingly demonstrate that the juice is harmless, people still won’t want to drink it,' Rozin said." 

From "The Gatekeepers Who Get to Decide What Food Is 'Disgusting'/At the Disgusting Food Museum, in Sweden, where visitors are served dishes such as fermented shark and stinky tofu, I felt both like a tourist and like one of the exhibits" by Jiayang Fan (The New Yorker).

Is Sandra Lee sending "peace and loving healing" to Andrew Cuomo?

I'm reading "Andrew Cuomo ex Sandra Lee wishes ‘peace, healing’ after 2nd accuser steps forward" (NY Post):

“Sending everyone peace and loving healing regards from Malibu! The best sunsets ever thank God for the Ocean!” Lee posted on Instagram Saturday night, alongside a photo of a beach. 

The post was made hours after The New York Times revealed [accusations from] Cuomo’s 25-year-old former aide, Charlotte Bennet, is accusing the 63-year-old governor of asking her inappropriate personal questions at work... days after another former aide, Lindsey Boylan, publicly accused the governor of attempting to kiss her on the mouth at his New York City office in 2018....

I'd say Sandra Lee is keeping her distance. This is a woman I had never paid any attention to until I was looking up Cuomo's Wikipedia page yesterday. I can't remember exactly why, but I suddenly needed to know where he went to law school. The answer is Albany Law School. Isn't that interesting? 

I got to reading the "Personal Life" section. There was that marriage to the 7th child of Robert F. Kennedy. And then there was an 8-year relationship with Food Network host Sandra Lee. I was curious enough to click through to Lee's Wikipedia page, and that led me to some of the biggest laughs I've had all year. Lee has an approach to cooking that she calls "semi-homemade." In practice, this involves using lots of processed foods and combining them in ways so ludicrous that it kind of has to be a spoof.

Much of the criticism of Lee has coalesced around a recipe for "Kwanzaa Cake" that she demonstrated on a 2003 episode of Semi-Homemade Cooking with Sandra Lee...Food writer Anthony Bourdain, who was harshly critical of Lee in general, described the video clip of this segment of the show as "eye searing" and "a war crime." The cake was called "scary" by the Houston Chronicle, and "the most ghastly-sounding dish in Lee's culinary repertoire" by Tulsa World.

Here are the Kwanzaa cake hijinks: 

 

That's very very funny, but the next thing I clicked on was so funny I nearly died. She makes a baked potato out of ice cream!

 

I love the way she resists showing any sign that she knows what she is doing is ridiculous and a phenomenal waste of time. If you want to take all this trouble, you should make something from scratch, and if you're going to buy convenience foods, you should take the benefit of the convenience, not futz around with them... especially not to form them into something utterly gross. 

And isn't this a metaphor for human relationships? Are we not all processed "foods"? 

When you meet somebody — let's say when you're Sandra meeting Andrew — you're not starting from scratch. Both of you have been through so much, like peeled sliced-up cooked apples in a can or a manufactured angel food cake. You might feel that these things should be combined — that Sandra and Andrew should form a relationship. 

But maybe they're better off kept apart. The angel food cake can be eaten plain. It's good enough. Processed, but okay. But those apples... don't you think maybe they shouldn't be eaten at all? Leave them on the shelf! Yes, the angel food cake has a hole in it, but that doesn't mean you ought to open whatever can you've got nearby and dump in the gooey contents!

"The second refrigerator can be a homey holdover or the latest model. And, for many, it can be aspirational. It may fulfill a yen for storage space."

"For others, its contents may function as edible insurance policies during lean years. And there are countless other reasons for a second fridge: frequent entertaining; storing kimchi or other specialties that take time to age; a tendency toward hoarding; or simply the cost of getting rid of a refrigerator.... The Vincents have passed on their love of multiple refrigerators to their daughter, Robyn Penniegraft, 46, who lives next door. Between the two households, they have five refrigerators for five people — not to mention other appliances such as an outdoor wine chiller and a stand-alone freezer from 1972, two years before Ms. Penniegraft was born. Appliances tend to arrive in 10-year intervals to the Vincent household — the 1982 fridge, the 1992 one. Ms. Penniegraft keeps a stand freezer and her second refrigerator in the family’s garage, side by side like fraternal twins. Last fall, the freezer contained a Noah’s ark of meat for the fried chicken and signature giant lasagnas she often cooks for friends; the other once housed the products that Ms. Penniegraft, a hair stylist, and her husband, Dante, mixed up for a now-defunct hair-care line." 

From "When One Fridge Is Not Enough/For many Americans, a second fridge — and sometimes a third — is another member of the family" (NYT). 

From the comments: 

As a life-long resident of the Midwest, this article cracked me up. During my childhood in the 70's I can't think of one classmate or family friend that didn't have a second fridge and a freezer (this group of people spans all social and economic classes). And most people also had a canning celler. My husband and I still receive our beef a quarter at a time, as in, 100+lb of meat, equivalent to a quarter of a full carcass, raised by a family member. We have friends that raise chickens, slaughter once a year, so 6-10 chickens go in the freezer too. Ice cream is delivered to our house (three cheers for Schwans!), it is bought in bulk, and in the freezer. Today, I only live 25 min from a grocery store, growing up it was more than that. My husband grew up in a family of 8 kids, they had three fridges, 2 giant freezers, a walk-in egg cooler and a giant garden that provided fresh food and was also preserved and eaten year-round; they were not rich, just self sufficient. I still can fruit, salsa, and meat and freeze my own sweet corn, not because we have to but because it's so much better than store-bought....

It's a grind.

"Tiny worms often breed in the mish, but are not dangerous. The saying 'the worms of the mish arise from it' means it is a problem that cannot be solved..."

"... but is not worth worrying about. The maggots comes from flies laying eggs on the cottage cheese that is left to drain on a straw mat, by the farmer in the open air. Sometimes they add Borax to kill the maggots, but you cannot use again as fermenting agent. If Mish is prepared in a factory, it does not contain any maggots."

I looked up "Mish" in Wikipedia. I love the simplicity of the image of this stuff...



And I love the metaphorical potential of the worms that arise from the food itself and that are not worth worrying about... though I am always going to object to maggots in any food you might want me to eat and the worms actually don't arise from the food, they are introduced by the flies, and it underscores that you don't want flies landing on your food.

But, anyway, I was looking up "Mish" because I was trying to figure out if there was any reason why I shouldn't link to this piece — "Trump Demands CNN Apologize for a Poll Showing Biden in the Lead" — written by someone who goes by the name Mish. This is at TheStreet, a website co-founded by Jim Cramer. I haven't come up with any reason not to read this article. Don't know if there are any worms arising from within, so let's dip in:

The Trump campaign claims is the CNN poll is "designed to mislead American voters through a biased questionnaire and skewed sampling." "It's a stunt and a phony poll to cause voter suppression, stifle momentum and enthusiasm for the President, and present a false view generally of the actual support across America for the President"... Two days ago Trump says he "hired respected pollster, McLaughlin & Associates, to analyze today's CNN Poll"...

Unusual Cease and Desist Order

The demand for a retraction and a very unusual cease-and-desist order came out today....

Totally Amusing Response

“To the extent we have received legal threats from political leaders in the past, they have typically come from countries like Venezuela or other regimes where there is little or no respect for a free and independent media,” said CNN executive vice president David Vigilante. "CNN is well aware of the reputation of McLaughlin and Associates. In 2014 his firm famously reported Eric Cantor was leading his primary challenger by 34 points only to lose by 11 - a 45 point swing. The firm has a C/D rating from FiveThirtyEight"....

At the Verticality Café...

... it's time for the late-morning snack, third breakfast, or early lunch, if you will. Never brunch, not unless you're a breakfast skipper. Breakfast skipper — that sounds like another name for Cap'n Crunch. The term "brunch" goes back to 1895, according to the OED, which finds it first here:

1895 Independent 22 Aug. 2/1 Breakfast is ‘brekker’ in the Oxford tongue; when a man makes lunch his first meal of the day it becomes ‘brunch’: and a tea-dinner at the Union Club is a ‘smug’.

A smug, eh? That never made it into the OED as a definition of "smug," but I think a tea-dinner at the Union Club sounds really nice. You'll have to wait a few hours for that, and you'll have to come up with your own notion of the "Union Club" — which was a "gentleman's club" in London from 1800 to 1949.

Thanks!

Late at night 2:00 and is amazing how on every supermarket, farmers markets Etc women and men like them will work non stop to replenish every shelve. Next to the Medical staff across the world, people like them are and will be heroes to keep humanity fed! Thank them! #CoronaVirus pic.twitter.com/6J006BbPpU

— José Andrés (@chefjoseandres) March 16, 2020

Why "Vegemite" is trending on Twitter.

Thanks to the Helpers. Let’s take care of ourselves and each other. Hanx pic.twitter.com/09gCdvzGcO

— Tom Hanks (@tomhanks) March 15, 2020